Work and Rewards

There was a recent Ensign article about work. I read it. And I read it again. And I felt guilty. Work? Sure, I work. I do a lot of work and I usually have a good attitude about it. My sweet husband works as well. I was incredibly impressed with him back when we were newlyweds (I still am, too!) and he graduated BYU. He had to wait a semester for me to graduate, and he took a job cleaning carpets. I looked at him and wondered why on earth a college grad would take a carpet cleaning job! And I realized he took it so he could support us. He wasn't too proud to do whatever job he could get. And in Provo, there's not a lot of jobs, other than the menial variety. I am impressed to have a man who will take what work he can and do it with pride to support his family. He never complained about cleaning carpets, either.

My parents taught me to work. They made me work when I was a kid, and I don't mind the menial labor jobs. There really is satisfaction in doing your job well, be it making cookies at the Brick Oven, or mopping the floors of the hospital. Yes, I actually enjoyed being housekeeping staff at the hospital. I worked 9pm-2am, cleaning bathrooms and other things. I didn't mind it at all. I minded the politics and other things, but the work was fine.

So, having read this article, I felt guilty. I am not doing very well on teaching my children to work. Its so much easier to do it myself. I don't mind doing it myself, either. To make it tougher, I'm not sure HOW to teach them to work. I know there are chores to do and rooms to clean, but how to make that a lesson in working because we need to, because it has to be done, and it can be done with a joyful heart? That's what I'm struggling with.

This week the messy house was a bit overwhelming, and after the girls knocked over the Christmas tree, Dan decided it was time to do something about it. So half the house was sparkly clean. I decided the kids needed some serious room-cleaning, and today I told them it was time. I told them what I expected and I told them that if all that got done, we could have an ice cream sundae party. The jumped to it with great delight. They stripped the sheets from their beds, picked up toys, emptied the trash, organized stuffed animals, and put the laundry away. There were no complaints and they all worked together with glee. It was wonderful!

My concern is, does this sort of reward/bribe teach them to work, or merely teach them that they need a reward to do work? It was wonderful to have it all done with a cheerful attitude, but will that translate to real-world situations? This mom stuff is hard sometimes.

But the ice cream sundaes were delicious!

When did I lose control?!

We had a great Christmas. We had a good weekend. Yesterday was fantastic as well. Today..... somehow I completely lost control. We had a play-date planned, because I knew the natives would be a bit restless. We had 2 of my friends come over, with 3 of the kids' friends. I thought they would all play nicely together. They did, but it involved a lot of running and screeching and it somehow required the pulling out of every toy they could in that hour. The toy pulling out was expected, the other total chaos was not. I don't know why it was unexpected, but it was. You'd think my children were savages, the way they acted. Plus, Callie kept getting food out. One of our friends had brought vanilla wafers and yogurt covered cranberries, and the other brought cocoa to share. So Callie figured she should share our cookies. I kept putting the bag back, and the next time I turned around, there were more cookies. (My delicious, oatmeal chocolate chip cookies that I made last night!) There were cookie crumbs all over, half eaten wafers, and random cranberries, and I never saw it happen. It suddenly appeared out of nowhere! The finally left the table and raced off to play, with more screaming and shrieking. In case you are one of our friends, it was all okay. The kids make bigger messes on their own and louder noises on their own, its just for some reason, I thought they'd play sweetly and quietly with friends, rather than so rambunctiously.

And somehow, that did not wear them out for the day. It merely set them up for an extended version of it for the rest of the day. Well, the rest of the day has involved significantly more tears, teasing and accusations of dastardly deeds. Plus, Rylee, (who was happy and content all morning) has been screaming most of the afternoon. It is a bit wearing on the nerves and amplifies everything else. I'm slowly teetering on the edge of santiy. Even as I sit here, I hear Callie saying "nah-nah-nah", And Marian is shouting "Shut-up". Oooh, now there is screaming......

Yes, Marian had pinched Callie in the shoulder. Sigh.

Let me remind myself why I have children, and why I love my girls, shall we?

Why Me?

This time of year with Christmas and the New Year coming, I feel like I'm suppose to reflect and appreciate and I hate feeling like I'm suppose to do that! I'm such a rebel. Despite that, I have been thinking about something I saw a while ago. There was a professional sports guy- I don't know who he was or what he played, I just know I saw him on TV. He'd been at the top of his game and something had happened and he's had some pretty rotten stuff going on, and the reporter asked him if he ever asked "Why me?". He gave the most amazing answer. He said he never asked "Why Me?" when he was successful and life was fantastic, so why would he ask that now?

Lately, I have thought of that and wondered, "why me?". Why me to have such a great life? Why me to be happy hanging out at home all day? Why me to have 5 wonderful, amazing, adorable kids who are healthy, whole and happy? Why me to have a great husband who does the dishes, takes out the trash and is currently holding a snotty nosed, crying, cranky baby? How did I get so lucky?

I mean, I made some pretty stupid choices in my life. (Obviously I made some darn good ones too, to be here now!) 12 years ago, if you'd shown me my life today, I wouldn't have imagined I would be here. I expected to be somewhere very different by now. So why did I get chosen to have a nearly perfect life? I'm pretty sure there was some intervention in my life to put me where I am right now. Why did the Lord look down on me and say, she gets to win the life lottery? I don't know. It makes me feel a greater sense of responsibility to do a good job with it though.

I am very blessed. I have a great family. I was raised in a great family, and I married into a great family. Seeing my children play together nicely today gives me hope that they'll also feel like they have a great family. I feel very thankful to have the Gospel in my life. To have an Eternal perspective and to have an idea of what matters has made such a difference in my life. I am grateful to know that I have an Eternal Family, and to know that my Savior loves me and cares about me. And I know that if I end up on the other end of the Why Me spectrum, I'll be able to endure and get through. And if I'm really lucky, I may be able to do it with the grace and the amazing attitude that my friend Bryn has. (Check out her blog on my friends list. I'm not smart enough to put a link in here!)

Christmas Traditions and Insanity

Growing up, we had some fun traditions. We read a feel-good Christmas story every night, we made gingerbread houses, we went caroling, made candy, read the Christmas Story, and we had the same breakfast every Christmas morning, and only on Christmas morning. When Dan and I got married, we merged some of his family traditions with mine, but mostly we did the traditions of the side of the family we were spending Christmas with. Last year was the very first year it was just our family and no relatives at all. I enjoyed it a lot more than I had expected. This year we again are on our own. I realized we have shaped some of our own traditions.

Dan and I both like reading Christmas feel-good stories, but right now the kids are quite unappreciative. I think we'll keep trying, but I may need to find a more updated book of them, or make my own collection. Last year we did gingerbread houses and it was a lot of fun. I wanted to this year, but with Rylee..... well, it just didn't happen. We did gingerbread cookies and the kids had a marvelous time with that. I usually make caramel, but this year I decided to try toffee again. For the first time, I was successful! It was so yummy! We made plates of goodies for our neighbors and delivered them.

I think I had made our traditional breakfast a few years ago and it was not a hit. I think that's why my family only had it once a year! So we have modified it and now we have cinnamon rolls on Christmas morning. I am also keeping the no-fancy-dinner policy I grew up with (till I was a teen). Why make food when the kids have gorged on candy? And this morning, that's what they did! We have kept the present-opening policy as well. Dad passes them out and yes, everyone has to wait their turn. I like it because I get to see them open and enjoy their presents. Plus, I feel like it gives the kids a chance to see their siblings enjoy the gifts they chose for them. And a little patience is a good thing for them to learn!

We developed a new tradition as well. Dan and I decided we wanted the children to learn the meaning of Christmas. We have been so blessed with enough, so the last 2 years, we have taken on a Christmas Project. Last year we picked out supplies and presents for the local Ronald McDonald house. This year we got a family to Secret Santa. I think the kids got more into it this year. They really had fun picking out presents and talking about the family we were Santa-ing. I had a great time as well, and I think we will try to continue doing this.

So, we had a great Christmas, and we seem to have added one more new tradition for our family. In addition to reading the Christmas Story on Christmas Eve, we seem to have made a trip to Mount Vernon a tradition as well. What will we do when we move?!

Rylee and I weren't feeling great yesterday, so Dan took the 4 older children to Mt Vernon by himself. There was still a bit of snow, so they all wore their boots.

Aladdin, the Camel was back again for the holidays!

Looking at this picture, I was really glad they all wore their boots!

Okay, this has nothing to do with Christmas. Joshua didn't pass his vision screening at school, so he got to visit the optometrist and I helped him pick out glasses. After he chose the ones he liked best, I took his picture so he could see what he looked like. This was the pair he liked best that I could live with!

It's Christmas Morning!

The kids let us sleep in till 7:30! This is what they were doing until then..... Eating all the candy in their stockings. They get to do that. They can open stockings and enjoy them till the designated wake-up time. Then Mom and Dad get up. They have to get dressed and eat breakfast before the present-fest.

Here they are, all dressed and ready for the loot! I am a bit surprised at their clothing choices, but hey, its Christmas! They each have a present receptacles and they are sitting in them!

My favorite kids in the world!

Joshua wore this when he was 3 months old! And now Rylee is in it. Who am I going to pass it on to?!

Marian picked this feather boa out for Callie. It was so fun to take the kids shopping for each other! Their choices were a hoot. (Marian got Dan and Joshua rubber chickens!)

Delaney loved her tutu and opened the rest of her gifts while wearing it.

This cracks me up. Callie got Dan a set of mustaches!

Marian enjoyed the morning very much.

Here's Rylee with all her new things (except her glowworm from her grandparents, which Delaney immediately confiscated and refused to believe was not hers!).

We've had a wonderful Christmas morning and the children are all happy, content and quiet! They are enjoying their gifts and getting along. And that is MY favorite Christmas present!

Merry Christmas to you!

The Aftermath

If you read the last post, you know that we had some fantastic snow. Close to 2 feet, actually!

This is what the kids looked like on Saturday in the middle of the day.

This is what Joshua looked like just before dinner!

This is what the girls looked like after they got done playing in the snow.

This was Sunday morning. Church was cancelled. We made the kids sit through a family devotional instead before we let them loose outside. And I went out to join them!

Marian made a lovely snow angel.

Dan cleaned off the drive and the van. Check out how deep the snow is!

One of the few sweet moments between Marian and Callie; Marian is pulling Callie on the sled!

We tried to make a snow fort by packing the snow in the trash can and dumping it out. This method worked really well for our neighbor last winter. Unfortunately, we had too much trouble getting the snow out of the can to do it! We piled the snow high using the shovel instead.

Callie ate snow. Fortunately it is gorgeous, white, pristine snow still.

I made a snowman!

After playing in the snow, the kids came in and were bored. Since our Saturday night Ward Christmas Party was cancelled, I had a lot of leftover, unfrosted gingerbread cookies. I had frosting already made and I thought, why not? I turned the kids loose on it all and they had a very good time.

Here they are, all together and HAPPY!

Note that Delaney is on her 4th layer of frosting!

Joshua and Marian were being so silly last night I made them let me take a picture. But Marian stopped smiling when I got out the camera.

This is what the front yard looks like today. They cancelled school thru Wednesday, so the kids won't go back to school before Christmas. They are now on their Christmas Break 3 days early! And Dan has the day off as well. I think he'll be ready to return to work tomorrow after 3 days snowbound with all the kids!

Insanity, Snow, and Pictures.... lots of Pictures!

We had a crazy busy week. I had so many things going on that I was a little stressed. Thus the lack of blogging. I had 5 events to make treats for, 2 dental appointments that were almost an hours drive away, a kiddie shrink appointment that I had to find babysitting during (and it was a waste of my time!), and too many events I needed to do something about. Whew!

We did something neat for FHE this week. The local Methodist Church does a living Nativity and we decided to go this year. It was really great. You went in groups and they walked you to each scene and told the story as you went along. At the end there were animals for the kids to pet and then you could go inside for hot cocoa and cookies. It was so fantastic!

It was also a really really cold night. I had told the kids to wear their jackets, but Joshua insisted he was fine in this. He was also grumpy that we had to wait in line for a bit till it was our turn. (It was totally worth the cold and the wait!)

This is the shaggiest donkey I've ever seen. He was part of the Living Nativity and was very sweet.

The people in it were very gracious and were willing to ham it up for this shot with Delaney, who wasn't as sure she wanted to be there.

Check this out- a pygmy cow! The kids loved the petting part so much they had to be lured inside with the promise of cookies at the end. It was a wonderful experience and I am so glad we went.

Marian got to make a "gingerbread house" at school. She was very proud of it and wanted a picture. Then the kids demolished it!

Wednesday night there was a baptism and Joshua had scouts. I had to make cookies for Joshua's event. I actually made cookies to take to both events, but they were so darn good, we ate the ones that were for the baptism! So I made dip for the baptism and I was sad that there were no leftovers. Anyway, Joshua had earned his Bobcat and I juggled being there for that, and going to the baptism. Hence, the skirt. Amazing how everyone in this shot has their eyes closed.

Tuesday and Thursday were spent driving nearly an hour (each way) to the special Pediatric Dentist. She has cavities in all 4 back teeth. The first visit was for him to look and say, yep, we need to fill those. The next was for them to say, hmmm, you're right, we will have to sedate her. They were going to fill all 4 on Thursday, but only got one done. I had said I thought they'd need to sedate her on Tuesday but they didn't believe me. So we get to go back again in January. Ug. On the plus side, Callie had a good experience and shouldn't have any trouble going back again.

Dan needed a food item to take to work on Friday. I made Gingerbread cookie dough, but alas, it was too much work to get it from dough to cookie in time for his work party. So he took crackers and delicious Harry & David dip. And the kids helped me roll out and decorate the cookies Friday afternoon.

In the interest of expediency, I frosted and let the girls dump on the decorations. They came out decent looking and very tasty. We needed them for a Cookie Exchange Party today, and the Ward Christmas Party tonight!

And they waited till we were done before pouring the sprinkles in their mouths.

And now, another abrupt change of topic.....

This is what we woke up to today! they are calling it a blizzard. It is now nearly 2pm, and its been snowing all day.

8:30am, Callie was the first one dressed and out in the snow.

11am, Marian looked like the Abominable Snowman! She was having a very good time playing and had only poked her head once in to get this hat.

Her hair was frozen in a halo around her face.

Dan was fantastic and shoveled the walk and porch, and cleared the snow off the van. I'll tell you that right now you can't even tell he did it. It won't stop snowing!

Delaney was a big helper too. She and Callie went out, came back in for an hour and then went back out for another 30 minutes. then they were done. The older 2 went out and stayed out. No pix of Joshua because he ran off with his friend to sled at the park.

We did still have our Cookie Party. That's because it was held by a neighbor and we were still covered with snow by the time we had walked the short distance to their house. We had a good (and yummy!) time and the children were thrilled to play with their toys.

Joshua came late and was so encrusted with snow that his sleeves were ice-covered and he dumped handfuls of snow out of his boots!

Delaney did pretty well. She did like the breakables, so I had to keep close watch on her.

Callie discovered the ponies and was in heaven! When it was over, I had to drag them home. They did not want to leave. But it was nap time for Delaney and I knew Rylee was going to be hungry. The snow had covered the trail we'd broken when we walked over, and we were covered with snow when we got home again.

Yep, still snowing! This is what it looks like right now, out the front window. Jsoha and Marian are back out in it and having a marvelous time! Our Church Activity was cancelled, leaving us with lots of cookies. And Church tomorrow has been cancelled as well. We're getting a White Christmas this year.... wait, we get one every year, hee hee hee!